Continuing Idigo’s top ten list based on Carrie Frye’s 111 Most Bangable Boys in British Literature, I give you my own personal list of most bangable British literary figures. While I respectfully acknowledge Indigo’s thoughts on Mr. Rochester, you will soon see that I disagree, and have included him on my list. Being that all three of us Blues have similar interests, we are bound to have similar tastes in men, so I admit to a few overlapping choices.
Making a list of British favorites was so much fun, thinking about why each one from Frye’s list would or would not make the cut, but I must say that the one thing that makes these men so hot and the one thing they all have in common is the British accent! I’m sure you ladies will agree that there’s nothing sexier than a hot guy with a foreign accent!
So, without further ado, I give you:
Sapphire’s Top Ten British Boys!
Romeo Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare (63 on Frye’s list)
I’ve always thought Romeo to be a bit stupid and shallow. First, he falls in love with Juliet by just looking at her, right after claiming to be infatuated with Rosaline. Second, he probably should have just asked Papa Capulet for Juliet’s hand in marriage; an alliance between the most powerful and richest families in Verona would have been in everyone’s best interest and the Prince would have most likely pushed the match to end the family feud and create peace. A lot of trouble could have been spared. That being said, Romeo’s young and impulsive nature probably makes for an enthusiastic bedroom partner. His attention is short lived, so he wouldn’t be an ideal long-term boyfriend, but I see him being ideal for a romantic tryst (all that flowery poetic wooing and all).
J.P. Worthing The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde (82)
Jack is a bit more demure and proper than Algernon, but I always liked him better. Being that I wouldn’t mind marrying a man who was raised out of a handbag left in a railroad station, I’d say we’d make a perfect pair and could travel under assumed names together, behaving however we liked.
Captain Hook Peter Pan; or, the Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up by J. M. Barrie (51)
I admit that my knowledge of Captain Hook is based off of Disney, movie versions of the story, and my Golden Book copy, so I am not sure exactly what Captain Hook is like in Barrie’s work, but I must say that I enjoy swashbuckling pirates. If he looks anything like the Captain Hook played by Jason Isaacs (yes, Mr. Malfoy), I’m all-aboard this fantasy train: swords, high seas, and a dark and slightly twisted pirate. The hook definitely needs to come off though for safety reasons.
<———Mr. Knightly Emma by Jane Austen (My own addition)
This character was not on Frye’s list, but I feel that I have to include him on mine. I realize I am going from one extreme to another with my choices, but I like variety. Mr. Knightly is Emma’s best friend and an all around nice guy. He is fair with his tenants, well-liked by his friends, and always appropriate in his speech and manner at social events. He is the proverbial “boy-next-door,” but sometimes it’s just nice to have a dependable and caring man who knows you better than you know yourself and still loves you anyway. Also, subconsciously, I may just have a thing for Jeremy Northam, who portrays Mr. Knightly in the 1996 movie version of Emma.
Don Juan Don Juan by Lord Byron (6)
I assume that Frye is referring to the poem by Lord Byron, in which Don Juan is more the victim of seductive women as opposed to being the seducer himself. Like any good libertine though, Don Juan’s reputation is well-known. His traditional role in legend as a womanizer and perpetual lover leads me to believe that the man knows what he is doing. Simply put, he must be good in bed and knows what women like, so what other reason do I need for putting him on my list?
Randolph Henry Ash Possession by A. S. Byatt (13)
Secret lovers and tragic ends have the makings for a passionate affair. Ash is also a poet, so there is that deep, artistic, hidden emotional soul going for him. Also, this historical fiction epic takes place in the Victorian period, so imagine the dinner jackets and high collar points.
Mr. Rochester Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë (1) ———–>
As I’ve said before in previous posts, Jane Eyre is my favorite book and I love me some Mr. Rochester. I’m a sucker for tortured and/or damaged characters and Rochester has a mysterious, dark, and brooding quality. Still, he has a gentle side, cares for Jane, and there is a passionate and kind man under the rough edges. We’ll just make sure Grace Poole puts an extra lock on the crazy wife’s bedroom door.
James Bond Casino Royale by Ian Flemming (23)
Indigo listed James Bond in her shortlist already, but I have to agree. The mystery, the danger, the suave sex-appeal that oozes from every fiber of Bond’s being, and of course the martinis, are all elements of this sexy spy. I can picture us by the pool, sipping cocktails, when a Russian operative opens fire, forcing James to return the barrage of bullets while making a retreat to his hotel room. The smoking gun, all that adrenaline, and the luxury surroundings will of course lead to a signature seduction meant to extract all my information about missiles, undercover Russian goons, and whatnot. He’s a love ’em and leave ’em type, but Bond Girls agree, it’s worth it!
John Willoughby Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen (30)
He’s a bit of the refined gentleman and the bad boy rolled into one. I believe that Willoughby courts Marianne with serious intentions, but in the end, the safety and security of money and an easy life keep him from proposing to her and instead prompt him to propose to the wealthy Miss Grey. He’s romantic, but reckless and wild at the same time, and has a bit of an unsavory past. He’s the handsome, carefree rake who sounds like a good time, in my opinion.
Aslan The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe by C. S. Lewis (32)
Just Kidding! I’m not really into bestiality. Here’s my real number one:
<———Heathcliff Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë (12)
Wuthering Heights has never been a favorite book of mine. If you are searching for a Victorian literary example of a mentally abusive, co-dependent relationship, look no further! Heathcliff and Cathy are the most screwed up couple in literature. But, based solely on “bangability,” in the spirit of Ms. Frye’s list, I have to include Heathcliff. He’s rugged, untamed, and emotional. This would be some hot and steamy love affair, with a love/hate vibe and very powerful emotional extremes. He would have to be my number one, based solely on the steaminess, the intensity, and the mystique of this resident of the wind-swept moors.
Check back for the final installment of Top Ten Boys with Cornflower’s picks!